I am 16 & I want a BMW….


Ever since I can remember, I got what I asked for. While other kids were playing with tops and yo-yo’s I was busy with my Twenty Thousand rand micro light remote airplane.

While others were going on school excursions I was sitting on the lap of Mickey Mouse and Donald Duck at Disneyland. At the age of six I wore my own personalized Rolex watch, and had seen most of the world already. I was a rich spoilt child and knew no hardship or faced any difficulty. I did not have to attend Madressah as I had Mufti Saheb coming over every day to take my Sabaq. The only thing I knew fluently was my Kalima and a few Surahs which took me a year to memorize. My parents did not worry too much as I was doing well with my secular education. I was always the principal’s favorite, my grades were excellent, I was the head boy in primary school and I headed our swimming team as well. What I could not understand is that I was an average student and yet I commanded such respect with my teachers. It was only after a while that I learned that Daddy had built our school tennis court, daddy maintains the school swimming pool and daddy paid for the school’s air-conditioning.

A month before my 16th birthday my Mum and Dad went for Hajj; It was their first Hajj and it was the first time I would be left in the care of my grandmother. For the first two months I had such a ball, my friends were over almost every day and my weekends were a complete blast. My granny slept at 8pm and only woke up the next morning. She had no idea what we were up to. After the first weekend we got terribly bored with all our electronic toys, and decided to organize a braai the following weekend. One of my friends suggested we experiment with marijuana as well. We all jumped at this opportunity and welcomed the idea as none of us had been exposed to this before. The following three weeks were spent in a complete state of trance, my poor granny used to prepare all that we needed to munch on, my friends used to bring bank packets of marijuana and we would smoke and watch porn movies till our lungs felt like old socks.

It was our final weekend before my parents got back, and we arranged our ‘Grand Finale’. We had asked some girls from school to join us and we made them promise to take part in everything we did, so not to spoil our last weekend. The girls (All Muslim)knew exactly what we had in mind before accepting the invitation. Of the four that had come one of them had succumbed freely to the advances that I made. It hadn’t taken us timebefore we were both in my bedroom and I had experienced my first sexual encounter with an intoxicated young girl. My friends were jealous because they could not get as far as I did.(This girl was only fifteen years old)

The day came when my parents were arriving, I almost did not make it to the airport. My head ached, my eyes could not focus and worst of all I felt dirty and guilty, a dirtiness which I have never felt before. I could not look into the eyes of my parents. Whilst their faces glowed mines felt tarnished. It felt like my mother could see right through me and she knew exactly what her son had been up to. Nevertheless, I went on telling them how much I had missed them; my father could not stop telling me about the big surprise that he had brought back for me, which he would only give me when I turn sixteen.(Which was three days from the day they arrived.)

The next day after they got back everything seemed so different. They seemed so distant from this world, my father did not go to work, he did not even phone his office and this was all to strange. They both woke up for Fajr Salaah and Dad went to the Masjid and tried to wake me up as well. At supper that evening I reminded dad that we had my BMW on order for my birthday and that we needed to pick out some accessories. This was the first time Ever! That I heard dad say that I,m not getting the BMW and neither am I getting any new car for my birthday. At first I was devastated; I had no idea how to react as this has never happened to me before. That night as I lay in bed not knowing what to do something struck me. I actually felt loved, I felt as though my parents have suddenly started to care about me, I felt normal and was so happy that I was not getting something I dreamed of all my life.

On the day of my birthday my father came into my room just before Fajr Azaan and woke me up for Salaah. For the first time in my life I entered the Masjid for Fajr Salaah. The feeling I got was incredible, I felt as if though the angels were watching me through the Masjid windows. I felt like Allah was smiling down on me and I felt like there was no other person like me in this world. This was by far the best thing my father had ever done for me, No amount of gifts or money gave me so much pleasure as the pleasure of performing Fajr Salaah in Jamaat(congregation).  I had almost forgotten that my dad had a surprise for me; it was only when I got back to my room I got a shock of my life. I almost burst out into tears, I felt so guilty yet so honored. I had never been so happy in my life!

How did they know what to get me and more importantly how did they know that I would love this gift so much! I just could not contain myself anymore, I turned around and saw my parents standing by the door and broke down sobbing in their arms. I cried so much that I wet my fathers Kurta. All he said was ‘Happy Birthday son may Allah accept all your dua’s.’ I stood in their arms crying uncontrollably saying that I am not worthy of such a gift. Mommy comforted me while insisting that I try it on and show her how it looks. As they left the room I glared down at my bed and still felt that I’m not worthy of donning such a beautiful Kurta.

It looked so clean and so pure. How could I being such a sinner don the garb similar to that of our Prophet Muhammed (Salallahu Alaihi Wasallam). Then I noticed a bottle of Zam Zam next to my new Kurta. I stood up and made dua to Allah to forgive for all my sins, I repented sincerely and as soon as the water touched my lips I instantly knew my duas were accepted.

From that day onward I have never celebrated another birthday, I read every salaah and thanked my parents and most of all Allah Ta’ala for not letting me fall off the straight path. Today I am twenty nine years old and I still go to madressah to try and finish my Hifz(Memorizing of the Quraan). I am on my eight para(chapter). I am married with a lovely son who is seven years old is just about completing his Hifz. I have lost contact with all my friends except for that one girl with whom I had shared an intimate moment with and that is the girl I married.

May Allah guide all those that have taken the wrong turn. Believe me when I say there is nothing sweeter than the mercy of Allah Ta’ala. Please I urge you to turn to your creator even if you have not done it all, just go into sajda(prostration) and cry to your Allah. You will see an immediate change in your life.

Parents I beg you! Your children don’t need your wealth, they need your love. Do not think you are doing good for them by giving them whatever they ask for. It’s up to you to learn to say no! For there could come a time when you may loose your child to shaytaan. They will only be the coolness of your eyes if are true in deen, For Allah’s sake guide them to the right path. May Allah be with All of us. Ameen

Hadith 36: Seeking Knowledge


honey for the heart

On the authority of Abu Huraira (may Allah be pleased with him) from the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allah be upon him) who said, ” Whoever relieves a believer’s distress of the distressful aspects of this world, Allah will rescue him from a difficulty of the difficulties of the Hereafter. Whoever alleviates [the situation of] one in dire straits who cannot repay his debt, Allah will alleviate his lot in both this world and in the Hereafter. Whoever conceals [the faults of] a Muslim, Allah will conceal [his faults] in this life and the Hereafter. Allah is helping the servant as long as the servant is helping his brother. Whoever follows a path in order to seek knowledge thereby, Allah will make easy for him, due to it, a path to Paradise. No people gather together in a house of the houses of Allah, reciting the Book of Allah…

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